Winds of change ...

Hello friends...

"Be the change you want to see in the world"

I'm not stupid. I get this quote. I know what Gandhi was saying. If you want people to recycle -- then recycle. If you want peace--be peaceful. If you want people around you to be happy -- then be pleasant -- and so on.  But forget the change I wanna see in the world, I'd just like to be the change I wanna see in ME.

It's the first day of February. I had 31 days to get 2011 off to a fresh, new, productive start.  So far.. not so good.

I didn't make any resolutions. I never really do. Probably because my wants are always the same no matter what time of year it is. Well, that and I usually look at my "year" as starting and ending with my BDAY...not New Years.

Regardless I had HOPED that I would do a few things or do a few things better. For example, I hoped to:

• Find our "church home". So far nothing seems to be our fit.
• Make more productive use of my time. Which would mean things like-- getting pictures loaded/posted faster & more importantly up to date in my online gallery (not just FB), read all my magazines I subscribe to, actually start and finish reading books I've bought, do laundry or paint my nails while watching a movie -- instead of just watching a movie.
• Get back in the "gym ritual" I had going back (for like 3 weeks) this Fall. It wasn't too much or too little.
• Blog something everyday, even if it's a phrase, a picture I've found online, a random thought. Everything doesn't have to be long and detailed like I tend to be --basically use it more like I currently do twitter & facebook. EVERYDAY-- to help get moving with my goal of writing outside of work everyday.
• Speaking of writing. At least once a week I wanted to write in a private journal. Had I done this in my life starting ten years ago I would have had plenty of content for two of the books I dream of writing! One day a week. Why is that so hard?!?
• Be more social--outside of my comfort zone that is. I want to do this by having weekly friend dates that may or may not be at my usual spot with my usual people. Monthly have coffee or lunch with someone thats an acquaintance or in my work circle (not a co-worker though), iChat or text with people I miss..daily. Most importantly I want to form stronger bonds with the few people I've allowed myself to trust in this towns (which i goes can go hand & hand w/ my 1st want in these bullet points).
• Start training with Lance (it's officially MMA time baby).
• "Play" in my closet in my free time so I never stress over what to wear!
• Start getting facials again and continue with massages every 4-8 weeks.
• Get my kids event started. (OK, I did do this...Yay!!! But it goes back to being more productive with my time. I'm not being productive. I procrastinate. So I'm not getting stuff done when I should and therefore stressing)
• Learn to use my iPad for better use than games, email and web browsing.
• Last but not least - (this contradicts all the above) - lower the expectations I set for myself. Because I am just setting myself up to have bad days when I fail.

I guess I can just shut up and start now. Not dwell on one lost month. It's Feb 1st and look at me...I'm completing a blog--while doing laundry. Then I am gonna do a kettlebell workout and in between sets create and print this months kids event flyer so I can get up early Thursday and take them around. Last, I'm gonna take a book to bed with me and read a chapter until I cant hold my eyes open anymore. Then do what I do every night -- say a prayer -- mostly for forgiveness, protection and gratitude.

I don't need to rest of the world following suit with this petty stuff. But I do need to do it to be a better me. Everything else then align.

Grace and Peace To You,
Stacy