Wednesday, July 7, 2010

True Colors

Hey Friends ..

I've got a good one for you .... "Don't you hate when you think someones true colors are sunny yellow and ends up they are just puke green".  Ha, that quote is a "Stacy Original" for ya .. originated from a very true story! Love it, right? hehe!

I'll spare you the details and just say that something happen in the past few months that made me second guess my usual "assume everyone is good till they do bad" attitude!  I know we all have temporary moments of evil that can overcome us and that is very normal. We all know that as humans we are moody creatures.  But sometimes things just happen that make you realize what someone did WAS NOT a mood swing or bad judgment call....come to find out they are just a bad person.

I wanted to write about this a few weeks ago, but it would have just been a personal rant, so I chose to to talk to a few people about this topic.  After talking to friends and even observing the actions of a few strangers, I've learned that most people, somewhere in the back of their mind, wonder if ANYONE is who we think they are at all? Most of us walk around with this wall up .. asking ourselves .. "Will I let this person in today" or "Hmmm do they deserve me telling them this secret", etc.

I totally get why people have these doubts about others .. in fact .. after what I went through a few weeks ago ..  I wonder if I should be more of a sceptic too? Well really I sort of became a sceptic after what happened with a best friend of mine.  After thinking about it I'm going to have to say (with a bit of hesitation) YES there are plenty of people good people that are exactly who they seem to be and who we think they are .. the problem is finding them.

In my adult life, I have made it a goal to only surround myself with good people.  I don't want perfect friends .. that would be way too boring.  I just want people that will be themselves, let me be myself, make initiative instead of always wanting me to do it, love me and stand by me through thick and thin and more than anything NOT talk about me behind my back .. no matter what!! Sadly it can take years to find out what someones "true colors" are and by then you have fallen in love with them, made them your "bestie" or if they are a work friend .. confided in them. Sometimes you never know someones true colors.  I have someone in my life that used to be married to someone that had a group of best friends.  They are still best friends actually.  But he has told me stories of how bad his ex would bash them and how the others would do the same.  I don't think to this day any of them know how much "hate" they have for each other.  I don't want friends like that!! No way!!

One day everyone finds out the truth about someone .. but the question following is .. now what?  Chances are we are going to put up these walls and let NO ONE in or become so picky and cautious to the point that it makes it impossible to allow anyone in!  Despite my "assuming the best" in everyone attitude, I am the first to do this when I get hurt and I'm not really sure how to keep from being that way.

I guess it boils down to hope. Hope that despite all the people that have and will screw you over .. there are still true, solid, GOOD people in this world.  After all, the opposite of this post is also true.  How many times have you thought someone was stuck up, a douche bag, selfish or mean and come to find out, they are a really cool person?

I think that it is true that almost everyone has good in them, but the ones that are bad are just too in love with themselves, too hung up on some part of their past, or more often something about YOU they are jealous of  to allow their true GOOD self to shine.

Here is to the continued search for really good people in my life.  Except for a small handful, the ones I cherish are all so far away.

Grace and Peace to you,
Stacy

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