Wednesday, April 1, 2015

My Accident Anniversary: A Wake Up Call I'll Never Forget

Hey Fit Fam,

"Life is a gift - I accept it. Life is an adventure - I dare it. Life is a mystery - I'm unfolding it. Life is a puzzle - I'm solving it. Life is a game - I'm playing it. Life can be a struggle - I'm facing it. Life is beauty - I praise it. Life is an opportunity - I took it. Life is my mission - I'm fulfilling it." 

Yesterday was a "milestone" birthday for me. Most people would try to hide their age (especially in the industries that I am in) but I'm proud to say that I'm 35 years young. Of course there are parts of me that are sad. Not because I'm getting "older" because I really do see that as a privilege, but I guess because I just want more time. I love life so much and I just wish I could rewind, ya know? I am currently doing so many things I wish I had started doing "when I was younger" and I am also at that weird age where "having kids" is this looming topic. The thing is .. I don't want them .. not now anyway. There are parts of me that think it would be fulfilling and fun and of course my husband and I worry that in ten years we will WISH we had them, but right now we just don't want them and honestly aren't sure we ever will. Being a mom, being pregnant, raising a child, giving up all our freedom - it's not something we want right now. But I'm freaking 35!! I know moms are getting older and older .. but I would be considered a GERIATRIC PREGNANCY!!! Not to mention ... I don't want to be the "old mom" in the pick up line, lol. So stop telling me "you aren't old" - - I know I'm not OLD but I'm old enough that there are certain things that I HAVE to think/stress about.
Then ... there is my career. Never ever did I expect I'd be starting over at 35. I mean, at 25 I had climbed the ladder and already had reached most my goals and had my personal dream job! I switched to different avenues of my career after that .. but never a complete career change .. or lack of.  So a job lay off at 35 in the only industry you have ever known .. is more than rough. But I can't complain. My husband is very successful we can live comfortably on one salary. But that doesn't change the fact that it's been an adjustment. It also doesn't change my desire for independence. It doesn't change that I'm a goal driven person that has been independent since the day I was born 35 long years ago, lol. Being a housewife wasn't exactly my goal in life for my mid-thirties, lol. I'm not sad or anything. I get to focus on blogging and my fitness goals. Plus the shopping is always done, meals are always prepped, house clean, laundry done, etc. It's just not where I pictured myself to be. Which is why I'm getting my certifications for training/nutrition and will be taking on some clients late summer :)  I'm also not giving up on my TV career. Hopefully there are some freelance gigs in my future. My GOAL is to figure out a way to combine my love of fitness/tv/journalism. I may not be where I expected I would be, but I have to trust that I'm where God wants me to be and if I'm not .. that he guides me to whatever/wherever that may be.

All that said. On to why I'm writing today. I really am just so happy to be ALIVE. 

I like to think that I've always been full of life. But I was also given a gift many have never been given. Yes ... I call it a gift. While 35 years ago (yesterday) I was brought into this world ... 17 years ago today God spared me from leaving this world.

April 1st is my "Accident Anniversary" - the day I will always wonder why God didn't take me home. I guess he had a bigger plan for me and here I am 17 years later still trying to figure out what that is. I may never know. But I know I'm so grateful to be ALIVE. Every year I write about this "anniversary" so there is no need for a repeat. If you would like, you can take a moment and read about my reflections and what happened when I blogged about it back in 2011. I also touch on it in my Fitness Reel. 

Each year when this day comes about my feelings are pretty much the same. Lots and lots of gratitude. I try to be thankful everyday but I always take time on April 1st to stop and reflect even more. When God gave me another chance at life that day, he never promised my road ahead would be easy. But I know He had a plan for me then. He has a plan for me now. I'm just here for the beautiful ride.

To say I've lived a blessed life is an understatement. That's not to say I've not had hardships. I have had many. I know I'll have many more. But I pray the good days outweigh the bad, that I can live my life to my best ability and that I can somehow encourage, uplift and help others along the way.

Count your blessings. Enjoy this day. You never know what tomorrow brings.

Love to you all,

No comments:

Post a Comment