Did you know that in addition to our finger print, each and every one of us has our own unique eye and tongue print? Yup, that's a fact.
We are each, in my personal belief, hand crafted and molded the way GOD wants us to be. We may look like our dad, act like a sibling, or shake what our mama gave us, but no matter how similar we are to someone else, we are all our very own person. Kinda scary if you think about it, to have this one and only unique and special person you are in charge of maintaining and keeping intact!
I know that many of us don't like the way we were molded. If we did then plastic surgery wouldn't be a $1.9 billion dollar industry and two-thirds of American adults wouldn't be on a diet any give day. I'm not saying it's wrong to disagree with what God gave ya, we are allowed to disagree. There are many things I don't like about myself and would love to change. We don't have to like or accept the way we look on the outside.
People that criticize others for getting plastic surgery kinda tick me off. I always look at them and say, "I bet you would get braces if your teeth were crooked. If you couldn't see and hated glasses I bet you would you consider lasik eye surgery. I bet you use special creams on your face to get rid of those fine lines or some teeth whitening toothpaste." Whether it's an anti aging facial or a full face lift, there really is no difference. Bottom like is you are altering your appearance. Some people do it for the wrong reason. Usually so that "others" will perceive them as "attractive" and I don't agree with that. I say do it for YOU if you want to do it. Regardless, no one should ever look down on someone for making a physical change they want to make. They especially shouldn't pull the "God made you how he wants you" card. True he did, but if they want to change what they are on the outside, let them!
Looking past the outside and going in, the peeve that I'm pondering today is simple. Change what you want on the outside, but why are so many people so quick to change who they are on the inside? Well maybe I shouldn't say change .. I should say "blend".
People wear these masks and peel them off to reveal one identity, after another, after another. Problem is that you can't remove those layers without removing some of your very own skin each time. I've seen these guys and girls everywhere. You are out and see them in one setting and they act and dress one way, then you see them in another setting and they act and dress another way. Or they are friends with a certain type of person and change who they are to be just like their "friend of the year". Why are so many people like a Chameleon, always trying to "blend in" to everything that is around them?
You know who I am talking about. The person in high school that was a surfer girl. Then the first couple years of college some band groupie/rock chick trying to become some singer/songwriter. Then a couple years later became a studious and preppy girl. Maybe they move and meet people with money, so they become obsessed with luxury fashion and trends. Then you see them the next year they are wearing flowers in their hair and are miss world peace. Hello! My name is .. oh wait .. I have been to busy trying to be everyone that I am around THAT I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM!
I get that people go through "phases". I'm not talking about phases. We all went through periods of discovery or tried a new trend. Sometimes life changes and we have to alter where we are. I am talking about people that just have no identity. The people who float through life on someone else's cloud. Seriously, we make life hard enough on ourselves, adding impersonation to the mix is just way too much effort, don't ya think?
I know that sometimes it's insecurity that gets the best of us. But honestly, I am sick of that excuse. We are ALL insecure and all a little bit crazy. Most people try to be the person they are hanging out with, or dating, because they feel they have to do that to be accepted? But why?! If you have to change or blend for them to want to hang out with you maybe you don't need them as friends or significant others. The best thing about my few friends is that I can pretty much say no two are alike!
If everyone were the same life would so boring. Let's try to embrace who we are! If you don't know who you are then make it your goal to find yourself and then stay true to that person! Which I am hoping is a good person .. if not .. I give you permission to change :-)
You were born original. Don't die a carbon copy!
Grace and peace to you,
Stacy
Friday, February 26, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Burnt Bridges
A friend loves at all times...
Proverbs 17:17
Just taking a moment to think about this short and simple but loaded verse from the Bible.
When you love your friends, you walk beside them, but not in front of them. You chase after them if need be. Heck, you help hide a body if that is what she/he needs you to do at the moment! Point is you don’t walk away from them just because they did something you don’t personally agree with.
Maybe your friend did something shameful or maybe even something illegal, but on the flipside maybe they just did something or made a decision that was perfectly fine. it was just something you didn’t see eye to eye on.
When someone means something to you, you are true to them just as you would want them to be true to you, PERIOD. You may have to hand out some tough love, you may even have to distance yourself in some situations, but overall when you are someone’s friend you may not have to agree. You don’t even have to support what it is they are doing, but at the end of the day, you do have to be there when everything is said and done. Maybe all you can offer is an ear, a shoulder to cry on, or a house to sleep in, but you don’t abandon them.
Now before I go further let me add that I’m not talking about people that live in self pity or people that have dug their own ditch. Sometimes those people just need a rude awakening. I am talking about an event that causes turmoil in a friends life and you don’t agree to who, what, where when and/or why. They may have not even done anything wrong. In fact, in most cases where this has been an issue for me or others I have observed, the friend that turned their back is the one that needs to check themselves!
Why is it that you see so many friendships fail for this very reason? So many families fall apart?
I had someone do this to me over the past couple years . It was someone I loved, admired, trusted and cared for very deeply. They slowly abandoned our friendship over something that was none of their business, further more something that wasn’t even bad. Something that was of no ones fault. Something that was of no significance to them what so ever!
I’ll never forget the way that made me feel. I remember wanting to say to them, “What is your problem? Are you really that self absorbed and selfish that you can’t see past the fact that you don’t agree with my decision? A decision that in no way affected you, only me!” (And P.S. sister, had you not been so selfish you would have seen it was a decision that was good for for everyone involved, but especially the only person that mattered ... ME.)
It was a slow sabotage. Nothing dramatic. No big fight or parting words. It just ... ended. The times we saw each other afterwards were forced and awkward due to her judgmental nature still showing. So, eventually any and all communication stopped. I had a hard time with it for about a year. I cried, I got angry, I picked up the phone and hung it up, I started emails and never finished them. Finally I just decided to move on. Why did I care anymore? This person didn’t deserve my friendship anyway. I would still love them, I forgive them, but I don’t need them.
Little things remind me of my ”break up,” but I was really reminded of the type of unselfish, unjudmental friendship we should have when a friend needed some support. A friend of mine did something they shouldn’t have to another friend. Something they weren’t proud of. Something they admit was not good. Something I wouldn’t have done. But I knew that they were hurting, so I told them I wanted them to know I loved them and was thinking of them, because sometimes even the person that does wrong needs to know they are cared about. It was simple text message but it meant a lot to her. I never mentioned it again.
Same goes with another friend of mine. On occasion she will mention she is an atheist. I simply tell her that I hope one day she will allow me to share why I love and believe in God. I add a fun loving statement at the end that I hope this for her, but also because I couldn’t stand never seeing her again after this short life is over. We laugh and move on. I never judge her for her differing opinion.
Isn’t this the type of friend we are supposed to be? A friend that loves at all times? I can’t say I’ve always been a good friend to everyone. I know I’ve been young, stupid, selfish, mean, etc. But I sure know that I have never let a true friendship totally vanish over judgment that should never have been placed or sides that should never have been taken.
I wanted to write about this today to get your wheels turning. Mine too.
Is there a “friend” out there that you have somehow “burnt bridges” with for no good reason? If so, really look at yourself in the mirror and think long and hard as to why. Was the reason any of your business? Did it even directly involve you? If it did, did that person mean what they said that hurt you so bad you stopped talking to them? Is it worth never talking again? If you can look in your own eyes and have peace allowing that bridge to be burnt, then good for you, move on! If not then maybe it’s time to pick up the phone or write that email?
My hope today is that bridges in your life can be re-built if you want them to and that before you destroy a bridge you think hard about why you are destroying it.
Grace and Peace to you,
Stacy
Just taking a moment to think about this short and simple but loaded verse from the Bible.
When you love your friends, you walk beside them, but not in front of them. You chase after them if need be. Heck, you help hide a body if that is what she/he needs you to do at the moment! Point is you don’t walk away from them just because they did something you don’t personally agree with.
Maybe your friend did something shameful or maybe even something illegal, but on the flipside maybe they just did something or made a decision that was perfectly fine. it was just something you didn’t see eye to eye on.
When someone means something to you, you are true to them just as you would want them to be true to you, PERIOD. You may have to hand out some tough love, you may even have to distance yourself in some situations, but overall when you are someone’s friend you may not have to agree. You don’t even have to support what it is they are doing, but at the end of the day, you do have to be there when everything is said and done. Maybe all you can offer is an ear, a shoulder to cry on, or a house to sleep in, but you don’t abandon them.
Now before I go further let me add that I’m not talking about people that live in self pity or people that have dug their own ditch. Sometimes those people just need a rude awakening. I am talking about an event that causes turmoil in a friends life and you don’t agree to who, what, where when and/or why. They may have not even done anything wrong. In fact, in most cases where this has been an issue for me or others I have observed, the friend that turned their back is the one that needs to check themselves!
Why is it that you see so many friendships fail for this very reason? So many families fall apart?
I had someone do this to me over the past couple years . It was someone I loved, admired, trusted and cared for very deeply. They slowly abandoned our friendship over something that was none of their business, further more something that wasn’t even bad. Something that was of no ones fault. Something that was of no significance to them what so ever!
I’ll never forget the way that made me feel. I remember wanting to say to them, “What is your problem? Are you really that self absorbed and selfish that you can’t see past the fact that you don’t agree with my decision? A decision that in no way affected you, only me!” (And P.S. sister, had you not been so selfish you would have seen it was a decision that was good for for everyone involved, but especially the only person that mattered ... ME.)
It was a slow sabotage. Nothing dramatic. No big fight or parting words. It just ... ended. The times we saw each other afterwards were forced and awkward due to her judgmental nature still showing. So, eventually any and all communication stopped. I had a hard time with it for about a year. I cried, I got angry, I picked up the phone and hung it up, I started emails and never finished them. Finally I just decided to move on. Why did I care anymore? This person didn’t deserve my friendship anyway. I would still love them, I forgive them, but I don’t need them.
Little things remind me of my ”break up,” but I was really reminded of the type of unselfish, unjudmental friendship we should have when a friend needed some support. A friend of mine did something they shouldn’t have to another friend. Something they weren’t proud of. Something they admit was not good. Something I wouldn’t have done. But I knew that they were hurting, so I told them I wanted them to know I loved them and was thinking of them, because sometimes even the person that does wrong needs to know they are cared about. It was simple text message but it meant a lot to her. I never mentioned it again.
Same goes with another friend of mine. On occasion she will mention she is an atheist. I simply tell her that I hope one day she will allow me to share why I love and believe in God. I add a fun loving statement at the end that I hope this for her, but also because I couldn’t stand never seeing her again after this short life is over. We laugh and move on. I never judge her for her differing opinion.
Isn’t this the type of friend we are supposed to be? A friend that loves at all times? I can’t say I’ve always been a good friend to everyone. I know I’ve been young, stupid, selfish, mean, etc. But I sure know that I have never let a true friendship totally vanish over judgment that should never have been placed or sides that should never have been taken.
I wanted to write about this today to get your wheels turning. Mine too.
Is there a “friend” out there that you have somehow “burnt bridges” with for no good reason? If so, really look at yourself in the mirror and think long and hard as to why. Was the reason any of your business? Did it even directly involve you? If it did, did that person mean what they said that hurt you so bad you stopped talking to them? Is it worth never talking again? If you can look in your own eyes and have peace allowing that bridge to be burnt, then good for you, move on! If not then maybe it’s time to pick up the phone or write that email?
My hope today is that bridges in your life can be re-built if you want them to and that before you destroy a bridge you think hard about why you are destroying it.
Grace and Peace to you,
Stacy
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Let's get this party started
It’s said that from simple beginnings come great things. If that’s true then I guess that means this is gonna be one heck of a blog :-)
The concept behind my blog “Simply Stacy” ... is .. well .. simple! I want you to have a place to come everyday, or almost everyday, and find simple stuff to read and discuss. It may be a sarcastic remark, a sassy story, possibly a random fact or even just a picture. Either way, you will certainly find a lot of random thoughts and maybe even some serious subjects from time to time. One things for sure .. you will find a mixture of simple subjects ... usually not simply stated! (Ya see .. I like to ramble.) I also really want to hear from YOU. If you have something you think should be a thought .. send it to me and I’ll consider it!
I’ve blogged for work in the past, but that was pretty much limited to “work stuff” and not always the most interesting or what I necessarily wanted to say. I’ve also kept journals on and off my entire life, but those are under lock and key :) For a while now I’ve said I wanted to start a blog ... I just didn’t know what in the world to write about. Finally I decided .. I don’t need to know what to write about. I’m going to write what I feel like writing. I do want to try to make this a positive experience. We have enough negative in our daily lives. While an occasional slip is okay ... we all have something to complain about from time to time ... I don’t want this to be a site for complaining :)
I’m not sure what is going to come out of this .. who is going to read my words .. or how long I’ll last (I have a habit of having great ideas and never really end up putting them to their full potential). But I do know that I look forward to meeting new friends and fellow writers!
Before I sign off for the day ... I do feel the need to add a disclaimer to my blog because people are so dang sensitive. Anything I say on here .. anything I refer to .. any subject matter .. etc .. is not related to my professional life. Please understand there is no direct correlation between this blog and my professional life other than the fact .. I am a writer.
Also .. please note that topics, discussions, issues, etc, on this blog may or may not be a personal experience ...therefore it’s probably not about YOU. It may be a story I overheard while sipping coffee at starbucks, it may be a friends problem or a strangers situation. Please don’t take my words seriously or frown upon any subjects I may or may not post on here. Life isn’t always roses ... so this blog may not always be either ... but I promise to always put a positive spin on any situation.
Grace and Peace to you,
Stacy :)
The concept behind my blog “Simply Stacy” ... is .. well .. simple! I want you to have a place to come everyday, or almost everyday, and find simple stuff to read and discuss. It may be a sarcastic remark, a sassy story, possibly a random fact or even just a picture. Either way, you will certainly find a lot of random thoughts and maybe even some serious subjects from time to time. One things for sure .. you will find a mixture of simple subjects ... usually not simply stated! (Ya see .. I like to ramble.) I also really want to hear from YOU. If you have something you think should be a thought .. send it to me and I’ll consider it!
I’ve blogged for work in the past, but that was pretty much limited to “work stuff” and not always the most interesting or what I necessarily wanted to say. I’ve also kept journals on and off my entire life, but those are under lock and key :) For a while now I’ve said I wanted to start a blog ... I just didn’t know what in the world to write about. Finally I decided .. I don’t need to know what to write about. I’m going to write what I feel like writing. I do want to try to make this a positive experience. We have enough negative in our daily lives. While an occasional slip is okay ... we all have something to complain about from time to time ... I don’t want this to be a site for complaining :)
I’m not sure what is going to come out of this .. who is going to read my words .. or how long I’ll last (I have a habit of having great ideas and never really end up putting them to their full potential). But I do know that I look forward to meeting new friends and fellow writers!
Before I sign off for the day ... I do feel the need to add a disclaimer to my blog because people are so dang sensitive. Anything I say on here .. anything I refer to .. any subject matter .. etc .. is not related to my professional life. Please understand there is no direct correlation between this blog and my professional life other than the fact .. I am a writer.
Also .. please note that topics, discussions, issues, etc, on this blog may or may not be a personal experience ...therefore it’s probably not about YOU. It may be a story I overheard while sipping coffee at starbucks, it may be a friends problem or a strangers situation. Please don’t take my words seriously or frown upon any subjects I may or may not post on here. Life isn’t always roses ... so this blog may not always be either ... but I promise to always put a positive spin on any situation.
Grace and Peace to you,
Stacy :)